Let me start by restating that I am a spanko, meaning that I find the idea of spanking to be very erotic. Reading about other real life situations have a very erotic effect on me.(I get a hard-on]) I believe it is similar for women who love spanking, in that it makes them moist, if not wet.
However, the actual time I am over my wife's knees [otk], and she is applying the hairbrush or bath brush, or using one of the other implements that I have shown, are not as enjoyable. Spankings hurt, they leave marks, but they are therapeutic. While being spanked, I have never stated please keep spanking, however, I have never had to plead to my wife to please stop. We did have a safe word, which means stop immediately if I state the word, but we have never used it. We no longer have a safe word, because if a reason exists for me to be spanked, then I should not be allowed to control how long I am spanked, it's intensity, or when it should stop. Those decisions are for my wife to make. [Also, my wife kept forgetting what the word was when we were talking about spankings]
My wife has always slowed her spankings somewhat when she has seen them being effective, with a desire of not hurting me. However, the nature of a spanking is to cause discomfort and pain. We, almost after every formal spanking, make love. If it is a on the spot swatting in the kitchen, then it is a minute problem solver and let's get back on with life. Thus, spanking and sex are intertwined in my mind, and fortunately, in my wife's mind.
My wife has never spanked me to tears, but that time will come I imagine in due course. If the situation merits it, and my wife makes that decision, then I readily accept my fate.
HOW HAVE SPANKINKS MADE OUR LIVES BETTER!!!!!
1. Lack of arguments.
We have not had an argument that has lasted more than five minutes in the last two years, and please realize that we both retired together two years ago, and thus are in a 24 / 7 living arrangement. [we do have some singular activities.] we travel together constantly also. Previous to spankings, we would have occasional arguments and not really talk or connect for a few days or more, as we nursed the grudge. Now the only nursing is me sitting gingerly in the evening. The last two arguments that I rememeber lasted less than five minutes, when my wife sized up the situation, and stated that we will solve this when we get home. I immediately knew from the tone that I would be spanked. I tried to back away from the argument, stating well maybe it is not such a big thing anyway, but she responded that I should have thought of that five minutes ago. One spanking was in the motel room when we got back to the motel.
2. Spankings solve my grouchiness:
Being not an absolutely perfect individual, I sometimes let the cares of the world get me down, and become grouchy. My wife has discovered that she can spank this away for me. While OTK, she reminds me of what a wonderful life we are having, how fortunate we are to have such great kids, also our great daughter-in-law, our health, and many other positive features. Note that each positive is connected to a number of spanks with the bathbrush. By the time the spanking is finished, I have regained my bright and positive mood that is normal, and I am so thankful for a wife who is so caring as to spank my blues away. I only wish I had told of my spanking desires twenty five years ago.
3.I have become a better listener, and thus a better social talker also.
This has taken a few spankings, before I saw the light, shall we say. It was well illuminated by my bright bottom. This evolved from being on the phone for 20 minutes, but not being able to give a summary of what the person had said. [oh, we talked about this and that]. Boorishly, I would tell other people about us, or more specifically me, but not really take an interest in asking questions about what they were interested in talking about.
I now listen, and greatly enjoy hearing what other people are doing or thinking. If I drink too much,[not drunk, not fall down], I talk incessantly. This has been changed for the better, both in terms of drinking and in terms of socializing.
4. I am extremely more considerate of my wife's desires, be they small or big, and thus our LOVE has grown more than I thought was possible.
She was originally totally against spanking. [aside: we have never once touched our children with even a playful spank.] My wife has been willing to spank me, to PLEASE ME. I, in turn, have tried to do the little things in life that relieve alot of frustration, things that show you are being considerate for each other.
[examples: regularly emptying the dishwasher, putting dirty dishes in the dishwasher, hanging up clothes instead of tossing them on the bed, or the railing in the hallway, putting the seat back down on the toilet after raising it, picking up the bathmat after a shower, and many other little things, that add up to one great big amount of caring, by showing that I am considering her feelings when I do things]
5. Being more social
I was often reluctant to get together with people I didn't know, but after a couple of spankings addressing this issue, I have found that meeting new people is more fun, and we are now entertaining beyond the regular small group of friends. We are both having a lot more fun, which improves the relationship.
6. On the spot wooden stirrer solves minor irritants
This solves problems immediately. If I am perceived as nagging, or just bitching about something, especially while my wife is making a meal in the kitchen, the stirrer is used on a bare bottom, until the problem disappears. My wife was annoyed by my behaviour, she has relieved this stress, and I have had it brought to my attention that this discussion or behaviour has just ended.
No hostility, a very simple solution.
Question: Had I been right or wrong?
bonnie's website stated it well: it's better to take an undeserved spanking than to miss a deserved one.
The disagreement was trivial, be spanked, and get over it. Far better than nurturing an argument.
7. We are both extremely happy, and I believe wholeheartedly, that spankings have helped us reach this level of happiness. My wife is not entirely certain, but does believe that spankings have helped the everyday happiness level.
We are now ready to advance the relationship with a spanking contract, which I will describe in a later post.